Home     Mission Statement     Free VIP Newsletter     Books     Blog     Articles     Affiliates     About     Contact
« « How to Work Smart    How to Make Money From This Site If You Blog » »

How to Get Back The Feeling of Control In Your life

By: Brian Kim - September 30, 2008

If you're a first time visitor, I highly encourage you to click here to learn more about this site to see how it can TRULY change your life like no other site can and how millions around the world are already benefiting and getting the VERY BEST VALUE out of it! Thank you for visiting!

We live in a world where we’re bombarded with things that seem out of our control. The economy is tanking, crime is rampant, we have global warming, you name it, you’ve probably heard it. It’s really easy to feel anxious and stressed since technology has allowed the media to expose all this information to us 24/7. We feel stressed because after seeing all this, we get the feeling that we have little to no control in our lives with regard to these matters.

We all want some form of control in our lives, to attain a certain sense of calmness and peace of mind in this hectic world we live in today. Perhaps there have been times when you felt like you were in control, but you find that it slowly erodes due to the constant exposure of news that reminds us what we are not in control of.

As a result, it’s easy to fall into victim mode, to blame others, to make excuses, and inadvertently rob ourselves of that powerful idea of personal power.

So how do you get back that feeling of control in your life?

Stop.

Just stop.

And close your eyes.

And take notice of how you’re breathing.

Then focus on controlling it by drawing in slow, deep breaths.

Control your breathing and you’ll be taking the first best step you can take in getting back control of your life simply because breathing is so fundamental to life itself. It’s the quickest and easiest thing you can do to get back some measure of control in your life and reconnect the mind and body while you’re at it. When you concentrate on controlling your breathing, the world slows down, your head stops spinning, and everything that reminds you of what you’re not in control of will get blocked out as your sole focus is on your breathing.

It’s a great stress reliever for that simple fact - it puts you back in control of something that’s important in your life that you can control. We tend to stress over the things we feel we have no control over, but when we control what we can while blocking out all those things we feel we can’t, it’s a deadly one-two punch to the overall feeling of not being in control.

The second thing to do is to take the idea of controlling your breathing to the next level by exercising. You take it to the next level in the sense that you take control of your entire body which is again, something within your control. You can control how much exercise you do, how intensely you do it, what kind of exercise to do etc., and again, it’s something you can FOCUS your mind on, canceling out all the things you feel like you have no control over in the process, plus you get the good endorphin rush to counter any negative emotions of helplessness that may arise as well.

But sooner or later, no matter how much you concentrate on breathing and exercising, you can’t block the things that you feel are out of your control forever, so what to do then?

Let them in, but FIRST, realize that there is giant FILTER standing in between YOU and everything out there you feel you can’t control.

The problem here is that media automatically acts as the filter for YOU. The media tells you what the message is from all the news out there and as a result, you feel stressed, because you never had a chance to control what that message was in the first place. It went straight through.

You accepted the meaning others put on it.

Now is the time to step back and say wait.

I DECIDE how I’m going to view this event.

I DECIDE how I’m going to view the things I can’t control.

I know that I can’t control it, but I know I can control my REACTION to it.

And therefore, I know I can establish my own frame of how I want to view and act from it.

Once you have that proper frame put in place, now it’s time to stop reacting and to start ACTING simply because taking action based on the frame that you established reinforces your sense of control, because you controlled what the frame was and now you’re controlling your actions that are based on that frame.

When you take action, it’s important to remember to FOCUS, because remember, focus blocks out everything except what you’re focusing on.

Focus on doing ONE thing at a time from the list of things you decided to do based on the frame you decided to establish. It will help to block out any temptations of accepting other people’s frame that they might impose on you.

With the biggest drop in history of the U.S stock market occurring yesterday, with the failure to pass the 700 billion dollar bailout, with the whole mess going on in the financial markets, it’s easy for people to start feeling like they have no control over their lives. The economy is bad, banks are restricting lending, credit isn’t flowing, jobs are being cut, inflation is getting higher, and it’s as if the whole kitchen sink has been thrown at not only the American people, but all those around the world as the American economy is integrated into the global economy.

Amidst all this economic doom and gloom, it’s easy to feel like everything’s out of control, but it’s important as what was outlined in the beginning of this article to just stop.

Stop.

And breathe.

To focus on the one simple thing you can control and that’s fundamentally important to your life.

Then, to take it to the next level by exercising, so as to get an even better sense of control, while enjoying a stronger mind and body, as well as the euphoric effects of the endorphin rush that ensues.

Now it’s time to decide how you will view all the economic news. How will you filter it? What kind of frame will you establish?

Some might view it as an opportunity to take a better look at their finances and to really take control over it.

Some might view it as an opportunity that can serve as a catalyst to kick them in the butt to get them out of that trap of complacency by seeing how they can increase their skill sets or start that side business to earn extra income.

Some might view it as an opportunity to really count their blessings.

However they view it, whatever frame they choose to establish, they will take action accordingly with regard to it.

In the end, we find that there’s a lot we can control in our lives and a lot we can’t. It’s only when we know the difference between the two by acting on what we can control, and establishing a frame on what we can’t and deciding what we can do based on that and actually getting FOCUSED enough on doing it, one step at a time, can we get back that much sought important feeling of control in our lives until we find ourselves eloquently stating the words of William Ernest Henly:

“I am the master of my fate; I am the captain of my soul.”

  Share |

  Email To A Friend   Bookmark Site   Read The Most Popular Articles

Similar Posts On BrianKim.net

Sign Up For The FREE VIP Self Improvement Newsletter To Get FULL ACCESS To ALL 500+ DEFINITIVE Articles on BrianKim.net And To Also Get The VERY Best Value From This Site
And Watch It Change Your Life!

Join Thousands of Subscribers From Over 140 Countries Around the World Whose Lives Have Definitely Changed for the Better And Who Are Actively Pursuing Their Hopes and Dreams!


(Actual Map of Newsletter Subscribers)

What Subscribers Are Saying:

As a subscriber you'll get:

    FREE Access to All 500+ DEFINITIVE Articles And Growing on BrianKim.net As Well As Links to the Newest Articles! packed with valuable information and resources on subjects such as goal setting, motivation, success, health, relationships, time management, and self improvement which won't be found anywhere else.
    FREE eCourse - How to Maximize The Power of Your Mind - learn what you were never taught in school about how your mind works, how you can maximize its power, and how you can use it to achieve the goals you've set. The material in this eCourse can change your life.
    FREE M.I.Ts - Motivational and Inspirational Thoughts sent Monday-Friday. These M.I.Ts will be personalized messages written by yours truly and will automatically be delivered to your inbox each weekday so you won't even have to think about it. It'll be right there when you wake up.

These M.I.Ts are purely meant to maybe provoke a thought, ask a question, make a suggestion and in the end, get you motivated and inspired to take action THAT DAY toward the direction of your dream because we all need a little boost of motivation and inspiration everyday, simply because the world is filled with such negativity and that fighting for your dreams is an uphill battle.

This VIP newsletter will contain more valuable information and resources like the articles found on this site.

And you don't have to worry about email blasting overload because I hate spam with the passion of a thousand suns put together. Your email address will not be shared with anyone else, GUARANTEED.

FIRST Name:
PRIMARY Email:

Due to the 500+ articles and comments being left everyday on them, I no longer have the time to respond to each one so I have disabled the comments section. If you wish to comment on articles and interact with me and other readers, you may want to sign up for The BrianKim.net Inner Circle. Invites are only given once a month and you can get more information by signing up for the VIP Newsletter.

   FREE VIP Newsletter

First Name:
Primary Email:

What Subscribers Are Saying

Here's a Taste of What You'll Get By Subscribing:

  • FREE Monthly Newsletter packed with valuable information and resources on subjects such as goal setting, motivation, success, health, relationships, time management, and self improvement which won't be found anywhere else.
  • FREE eCourse - How to Maximize The Power of Your Mind - learn what you were never taught in school about how your mind works, how you can maximize its power, and how you can use it to achieve the goals you've set. The material in this eCourse can change your life.
  • FREE M.I.Ts - Motivational and Inspirational Thoughts (written by yours truly) that'll inject a daily dose of positive energy, help start your day off right, and move you forward to the achievement of your goals.
  • It's completely FREE and you may unsubscribe at any time...